Aida, Kakros & Sofi in Sing...

Omar and I brought all of them to Fort Canning Park, the most historical place in Singapore. Aida and Sofi were pretty excited about climbing this hill.

My friend Aida did not expect we would bring her to climb a hill. But she had endured climbing almost 100 small stairs with her demure dress and 2inch high heels.

After breakfast at Yakun Kaya Toast- Singapore style breakfast, we had a nice walk to Clark Quay. The weather was nice and not many people hanging around. So we decided to take a cruise with boat or 'tongkang' to esplanade. It costs only 5 dollars and we had a real great time. Kakros decided not to take the boat with us as she was afraid of vomitting. Anyway, Aida and Sofi had a good time in the boat and I was so happy to see them enjoying themselves.

Aida told me that the view at Boat quay reminded her of Brisbane and "someone". So I decided to bring her to have seafood dinner there. It was her treat. Thanks. We had a nice seafood dinner near the river and the view was so fascinating.

Aaqil was enjoying his meal, rice and beancurd hotplate.....

Fort Canning Park

Last Sunday, we had a nice eventful day. After a fulfilling breakfast at Long John Silvers, we accidentally found a free museum, the Civil Defence Heritage Museum near the foot of Fort Canning Park, our 2nd destination, the most historical place in Singapore. Initially our plan was to jog and recce this place but we then we ended up like a tourist, taking pics non stop . I hope you enjoy these pictures and if you visit Singapore, please do climb up Fort Canning, it is worth the calories burnt.

At the Civil Defense Heritage Museum, free admission

"strategic British battleground command centre during WW II. Many underground bunkers & cannons are built here..

This could be 'Sang Nila Utama rest place, the founder of Singapore...

Aaqil always prefers outdoors and the green scenery ...

View from the hill...

I notice Aaqil is musically inclined. He was enjoying himself with this toy keyboard. Well, i am going to let him decide which path he charters, guided of course...I remembered when I was small, my late mom had financial difficulties sending me to piano lessons. After which, somehow I realised she also opposed the idea of liking music. Based on researches, kids are using both their left and right cortex when they play piano, exercising their problem solving skills. I am sure every kids are born different though, and telling them to like what you like .... hmmm... I think its inappropriate....

Part 2: Aaqil in Malacca and PD

Some people said it is a hassle to bring small kids travelling. I beg to differ. With Aaqil, our travel is such a great and fun experience. Aaqil definately was enjoying himself discovering new things, new place and new people around him. The best thing is I don't have to pack much things since he is a breastfed baby.

At the seafood dinner night in Malacca, my friends were discussing on being a SAHM. A friend of mine then said " ...you are a stay at home mom because you are committed and omar can afford for u not to work". Again, I beg to differ. The reason for me to be a SAHM is solely my decision as I wanted to explore motherhood with my own hands. If we plan well, money will never be the barrier for any SAHM. I hope, at least for 2 years I can look after Aaqil myself until he weans off my breastmilk. I strongly believe that my sacrifice of 2 years being a SAHM will be paid off. Back to the seafood, the tempation of "ikan bakar" and variety of seafood were hard to resist. Since we dont have a maid like others (we decided not to), we took turns to eat. That is part and parcel of being parents I guess, till he can sit and eat together on the table with us.

Wahir and family and helper

Look at the damage we had done

The next morning Aaqil woke up with a smile on his face, although he knew the surrounding was different. Me too, as I was expecting a close friend and an old classmate to come to my room. We had a decent breakfast and Aaqil had a swim with his dad.

Thumbs up!!..thanks Auntie Aida..

We then proceed to Wahir's place. The curry mee and porridge were delicious. Thanks to the host for a spectacular hospitability and care. I did have a great time with all the anserians. Though it was short but definately I left Malacca with a sweet memory.

Omar wanted to try the trunk road so we left early to PD. On the way there, we found a nice stall selling banana fritters and chendol. We stopped and ordered so much banana fritters and the seller had fun chatting with us.

"..nice serene place to have a snack...."

The first time I read about Corus Paradise, I thought I will not have a problem there. Apparently, I was wrong. The service was bad and slow. Omar almost lost his mind when he could not find the bell boy with our heavy luggage and other staffs seemed to ignore our problem, since we were not allowed to park at the drop off point and the available parking lot was like 100m away. Maybe they are too popular and the house was full that day. Their tone was never friendly with us. Putting those petty things aside, we looked at the fun things we did....'catching the sunset" and walked around the beach.

Despite the service, the view of the horizon cooled us off...

How bad can our travel be?? No matter how bad we screw up, he will there to cheer us up...

Part 1: Anseri Gathering in Malacca

I am actually too tired to write for now as I have just arrived Singapore but I hope all of you enjoy these pictures, courtesy of the host, rimaugirl and my camera. Be back for more...Last but not least thanks to all...Fantastic and memorable meeting after so long....

Batch 7 Anseri gals

"Beratnya hati nak meninggalkan mereka sob sob" ..Last pose before I left to PD

Sexy?? Up for grabs!!!

This is how we describe 'muka kekenyangan'

Aida looks so refreshing with her new hair style, Paroe as usual busy and look how Aween maintains her figure..

I believe in good and evil spirits indeed. Sometimes I ask myself why some Malays close their doors ONLY at dusk (Maghrib) so that the evil spirits will not enter the house? Closing the doors will not prevent the evil from penetrating the house. Then I squeeze my tiny wheeny brain.... trying to find the logic behind it. Maghrib is the shortest prayer time and everybody should be in the house in order to fulfill our responsibility as a Muslim. But why our elderlies created those reasons? Well.. today my topic is not really about the spirits, genie(s) or satans...

The 'good spirits' at the beach, having serious fun with one another...

Last Wednesday my beloved son was hit with vomitting. I consider myself as fortunate because Aaqil hardly gets sick. Normally if he has a slight fever, I will just have to breastfeed him and monitor his temperature. But that fateful day, being alone and helpless, I finally decided to bring him to Children Emergency Dept at KK hospital after a series of vomitting. The queue was long and after some drama, I managed to cut the queue. After being checked by the pediatrician, Aaqil was put on observation for 3 hours and finally his vomitting stopped. It did not end there because after his medication he was hit by diarrhea at home. The next day I was hit by food poisoning after my FIL brought over some mutton beriyani. The smell of indigested beriyani is still haunting me. I guess I will not have beriyani for the next 5 years. My vomitting was so traumatic that I will have to say it was similar to my labor pain.

I believe anybody in my sick position with a sick child will need moral support. Unfortunately, some would choose to criticize rather than giving support. I am sorry to say that in my case they were all known to be women. Instead of helping me or give me some constructive advises, they blamed on our beach trip last weekend as a reason of Aaqil got the vomitting. Our outing was on Sunday and Aaqil was hit on Wednesday. So how could that be? And the best part, some believe there are bad spirits along the beach. Yes I do believe in the existence of spirits. It is everywhere, not just beaches.

Aaqil showing off his underwater skills...

Aaqil will definately get sick sometimes as he grows, I'm thankful to God for giving me the knowledge and strength to go through his entire sick period, but why 'all these women' think baby cannot get sick huh?? My very close relative even asked me to stop breastfeeding when she saw me bringing Aaqil to the toilet every half an hour. What a pity to be ignorant? Didn't they know that breastmilk will shorten the diarrhea? Diarrhea can last up to 7 days but in my case this time, Aaqil's diarrhea stopped after 2 days with my countinuous breastfeeding, thank GOD!

Notice his happy face in the sea? I really hope, actually I knew I am doing the right things. I don't want him to grow up being afraid of the things made up by our old folks. By making him enjoying outdoors, God willing, he will grow up to be independent and appreciates the beautiful GOD-created nature. GOD-created 'nature' which includes forests, mountains, rivers, beaches with sea water, the peaceful and dark nights etc... but all these places/times are often related by people as 'dirty', full with roaming spirits... I wonder why... These roaming spirits are afraid of residential estates that you feel so safe at home??

To all my friends, GOD has created wonderful things on earth and whatever beyond our knowledge, and you want me to fear his creations? Yes, at times I do fear the unseen, ghost etc etc, but my religion teaches me to fear nothing but GOD, and that is what I have to fight for. You believe in HIM, seek protection from HIM, and HE will protect you. But if you believe that the spirits and ghost and etc etc is more powerful than our CREATOR?... you must be joking......!!

E L C

eArLy LeArNiNg CeNtRe

Just another groceries day at Carrefour and checked out the newly opened ELC, besides their other branch at Paragon. But of course, quality toys do have quality prices, developmental learning toys that is...

with all these toys available for play, Aaqil won't need one at home...

Yeah, he won't need one at home, rather than spending lavishly on unnecessary 'I-want-to-have-it-mommy' toys, I would prefer taking him outdoors and let him learn what he sees and experiences. Furthermore, he is at a stage of dumping his belongings, nothing will last with him, got pretty bored easily. Yes, for now I told him to talk to strangers....

Aaqil interacting with an ever-friendly ELC staff; whom enjoyed entertaining him...

At the end of the day, we both enjoyed ourselves, productively, we are always learning about one another and always will, I hope. For me, observing Aaqil's character changes day by day, and his way of expressing things, give me lots of chances to understand and appreciate his growth and disciplining him will be 'our' next task-of-honour!

Yeah! We made it this far...

Once Upon a Time in MRSM Perlis....

Having chicken rice on a weekend in Kangar town

(from Left: Yang, Ija, me, Has & Aida)

Our dormitory

Dedicated to my friends...

A friend in need is a friend indeed? Well, some might not agree with that... anyway... It all started on one of the early days in college when an important piece of paper fell down the drain. That paper contained signatures of our senior students in that college. Though it might sound stupid, but 'freshmen' or 'freshies' were required to obtain a number signatures of senior students during our orientation period. Noor Yang and Rosniza went down that drain, despite the 'drainy' smell, to rescue that piece of paper. Yes, that paper belonged to me, who was a stranger to both of them at that time. They found me crying by the drain not knowing how to rescue that poor piece.

That was how it started, we became close and spent most of our times gossiping about arrogant seniors and hoping they would trip and have a stupid fall. Not all negative gossips though, those interesting ones included describing how handsome those senior male students were. And everybody would get excited when we had close encounters with those male seniors, the mosque was located near the male dorms, and our sincerity and faith towards our prayers in the mosque was questionable!

As a 'freshie', we were not supposed to look up whenever a senior male student crossed our path, and greet the female ones with a salam. Those things continued for about a year till those senior students graduate. Well, we had our chances too when we became senior students, 'freshies' came to us for signatures and being greeted them. Thinking of it now, that was extreme disciplinary measures, unsure whether those systems will work now though.

Back to the friendship formation, I later introduced Hasniza into the group, a hometown friend. Noor Yang gained her popularity as a debator, and later introduced Aida, also a debator, to complete the circle. 5 of us became best of friends through our college lives.

Now all of us is leading our own interesting life. I don't wish to write more...as we know our stories well...Just to let all of you know..I was lucky to have all of you as 'True Friends'.

Those were the days : Having maggi in my room 406, Block Anggun, Mrsm Perlis

"Life won't be interesting without you around..."

We are extremely lucky that our home is within walking distance to Kallang Riverside Park. These park connectors have been built on both sides of Kallang River, it is a heaven for water sports enthusiasts. Today, we had a nice exercising cum nature walk. What a wonderful day it was without having to spend any monies on shopping and expensive meals! Aaqil was entertained and amazed by the scene of canoers and waterskiers and 'dragon-boaters' practising and proudly displaying their skills.

The park is full with trees and palms, of course and that decorated its landscape. I did not put on sports shoes, sports sandals instead, I missed the chance of a full jog.

Aaqil relying on that stroller after he realises how exhausting he is walking non-stop for already 20 minutes...

After dinner wih Bapak, my way of saying thank you...

My Neighbourhood Babies...

Everytime my neighbour from upstairs passes by my apartment with her baby, I would secretly feel it is time to get a second one. Her baby is so chubby and adorable. Since Aaqil is a toddler now and getting busy 'in his own world' , I am considering for him to have a 'sparring partner'.

But the thoughts come and go...

My mind is still fresh of the trauma of my labor. I was unlucky to be in the delivery suite for almost 22 hours as I went early to the hospital due to false labour pains already contracting every 5 minutes. The hospital did not allow me to go back as I was already in my 42nd week. Normal pregnancy term is 36 weeks to 40 weeks. Well, I am sure if I am in Western countries, it is normal to be at 42nd week, but KK hospital totally opposed active birth, only DOCTORS will make decisions for you. I then fought for natural birth and rejected any forms of induction and drugs. They had to agree on my birth plan and I had to sign a disclaimer. Sure, I signed it happily as the life of me and my unborn child lies in GOD's hands and not theirs!!! My labor was actually what I wanted only that, it was long and painful. I still remembered Omar argued to those doctors that offered me epidural or do anything that could speed up my labor.

After all, I will leave it up to GOD to decide on my 2nd one, since HE decided my first only after 2 years of marriage.

Anyway, today I had a surprise visit from San San and her kid-son Ben. They are my neighbours from upstairs. I was so happy to hold the huggable Ben for the first time. He is 3.5 months old. Aaqil seemed so happy too to see them. He got excited though he was sleepy and tired. Ben, a breastfed baby looks so healthy and already weigh 7kg. I then flipped some pics of Aaqil when he was 3 months. Was wondering whether Aaqil was that size when he was 3 mths. Yes, he was as per pics below. Fat?? He was also developmentally ready to use Bumbo seater, the fact that I can say his head was already strong at that time.

For me this product is an awesome invention...(Aaqil 3 mths old)

His inquisitive looks, aiming for the camera (3 mths old)

Ben was enjoying himself on Aaqil's bumbo seater

Besides Ben, I have another baby that lives next door. We call her Yu Xi and she is 11 months old. Aaqil loves to sneak out of the house to play her toys.

"Yu Xi spent time with Aaqil on his 1st B'day"

I believe that Aaqil will never be lonely in my neighborhood. I normally get very impressed to those who are planning to have 10 kids . One of them is my friend, Pang5. Anyway he is expecting a 3rd one. Congratulations again and fertility not always counts.

Aaqil in Action..

Aaqil, pls pose for our relatives, mommy's friends and fellow bloggers....wherever you are.....!!!
Aaqil is 16 months old today....How time flies!!...and I am getting old too....Yeah!!

He always insists on self feeding...

Smile for all....

"What could be more important than making our boys into good men? Doesn't the whole human civilization kind of depend on it?"

-A teacher at workshop on the moral development of boys

Complain Letter to Tan Tock Seng Hospital..

A gentle reminder : Do not mess with a breastfeeding mother when it's time....

Dear Sir/Madame,

I am writing this with diffidence and considerable regrets. It would be discourteous of me not to give clear indications on why I am writing this feedback but it would be impossible for me to do so without seemingly causing offence.

On the 9th November 2005 at 1700hrs, I accompanied my father-in-law and his wife to your A&E Dept as he was having intense giddiness. His wife is a discharged cancer patient of yours and she is not physically healthy, thus that is the reason for why I have to accompany both of them with my 15 month old baby.

Though I was advised by several friends that it is not suitable for babies to be in the hospital for long hours due to many reasons but I have to take this responsibility as my husband was working at that time and no one was available to see my father-in-law to the A&E. He was put on observation for several hours and was later discharged at midnight.

Sir/Madame, this feedback is nothing about complaining long waiting hours but the attitude of one of your attendants working during that time.

I am a breastfeeding mother to my baby, and I do understand there are no nursing rooms in the A&E and I don't have any problems nursing in public. But, that eventful evening, my baby was so active that he tended to skip his nursing times due to the active movements of people in that area and I need to seclude him for a moment to breastfeed. Upon going around and couldn't find a secluded area, I asked one of your friendly cleaners if there is any discreet or secluded area so I can nurse my baby 5 minutes. He allowed me to use the staff pantry, though initially I can see he was hesitant or maybe afraid to allow me to use the staff area. Appreciative of his kindness, I entered the staff pantry to have a quick feed for my baby, and yes I was truly aware that area was out-of-bounds to public, and I decided to leave as soon as my baby had quenched his thirst.

The moment I entered and was about to lift up my blouse, a male attendant barged in and raised his voice asking me what was my doing in there. Of course he did startle me and my baby, but I told him that I have asked permission from one of the staff. To my surprise, his response was that, "He was only A CLEANER!" Now my question is, what did he meant by saying I got permission from only a cleaner? Was working as cleaner in TTSH a low-life job that an attendant was allowed to insult him just like that?

Controlling my disappointments, I told that attendant, I just need to nurse my baby, but I was already ready to leave after given such a treatment, although in the end he gave in and allow me to nurse for 5 minutes and I saw him scolding the cleaner after that. I did apologise to that considerate and thoughtful cleaner for risking his job and allowed me to use the staff pantry.

With all due respect Sir/Madame, it might be my mistake for crossing the staff's boundary, but I have no choice to make, my baby needed to breastfeed and I just need that 5 minutes. But the way I was treated by that attendant and the way he insulted a TTSH cleaner was totally unacceptable.

I was previously so impressed by the positive attitudes of your staff since I have been to the A&E several times noticing the hot drinks served by your nurses to the waiting patients and their relatives but that incident totally changed my perspectives. Nobody was so approachable that eventful evening, but when I found one, he was in returned insulted and in fact scolded, in public, an act of inhumanity.

I am not taking these matters any further, but I hope you can advise your attendants to behave professionally in public eyes to uphold and maintain the service quality of your hospital.
Thank you for taking your precious time in attending to this feedback.

Sincerely,
Aminah Azirah Azmi
(S 7581778 I)

Eventful Day..

After learning that my FIL was having giddiness and terrible headache since last night, I got myself ready to join them at Tan Tock Seng Hospital today. Aaqil and I arrived there by cab at 4pm and I straight away called my FIL on his mobile asking his whereabouts. Before that, I was told by a friend not to bring Aaqil to the hospital as you never know what are the diseases people are carrying there. I totally have a mix feeling whether to be there or not, initially. At A&E (Accident n Emergency) Department, I met my weak FIL and his wife. His wife whom I called Aunt Aida is a filipino. She is a nice person who can play piano well and likes to entertain me and aaqil with food. Unfortunately, she is not somebody who is strong when it comes to problem. She totally freaked out today fearing that something terrible could happen to my FIL and she has no where else to turn to. Without wasting my time, I helped my FIL with the registration. I saw the fees on the board...I told myself .."waliaauuu so expensive...registration 70 sgd...how about those who does not have money and in emergency" Anyway, my FIL is a civil servant and he definately doesn't have to pay hospital fees, just like in Malaysia.Time showed 5.10pm and I knew I would have to wait real long. Always the typical expectations for semi-government hospital. It is impossible for me to leave a freaked out lady. So with an almost 10 kg hyper-cranky baby, I was trying my best to make Aaqil feel accomodating in the hospital. Aunt Aida had been with my FIL most of the time and I was in the waiting room doing nothing. Every 10 mins I would see an ambulance bringing in a patient. I was having goose bumps most of the time seeing blood and body fractures. As time went by, Aaqil was craving for my milk. He had been lifting up my shirt to get his milk. I looked around...Oh No, I did not see any sign of baby room. Well then, Aaqil's mommy would have to breastfeed in public. But then I decided to ask a malay cleaner lady whether I can use any discreet room for me to nurse for 10 mins. She did offer me her store room. I should not have complained but then it was cramped and strong disinfectant smell came from there made Aaqil so uncomfortable and refused to nurse...So I went out. I was searching for a best seat to breastfeed in public but the crowd made me so uncomfortable with horrible sights of sick patient. There was one group of Tamil gangsters who were involved in a fight and 3 of them were bleeding. Closed one eye, I tried to latch on but Aaqil got so distracted by the noisy environment and keep pulling his head away from my breast that made me so uncomfortable and of course I had already attracted some ppl to ogle me. I am sure they could not see my breast but they kept ogling. I then approached one indonesian looking cleaner who was smiling at me. I told him I need to nurse my son in indonesian dialect. Without any hesitation, he asked me to use an empty pantry room right in the end of one corner. Thanking him, I straight away went there as Aaqil already made so much noise asking for my milk. When I was about to close the pantry sliding door, one big built man suddenly appeared and asked me in a high pitch voice " What are you doing here? Dont you see the signboard saying it is for staff only" . Panicked and totally surprised, I said " I did ask one of the hospital staff. I just need to nurse my son for a few minutes while waiting for my FIL in oberservation. We have been here hours already!!!" I tried to explain to him courteously. He then said, "You were asking a cleaner. He does not know anything". I stared at him, now not because I couldn't breastfeed my son, but because I was furious he insulted 'a cleaner'. At that time he was wearing normal clothes and I did not know what is his position. I told myself, this arrogant bastard will get it. I then carried Aaqil and wanted to leave the room, I stared at him again and he said finally " ok..only 5 minutes" Putting my furious ego aside, I stayed back and nursed Aaqil. Immediately after I was done, I went to look for the nice cleaner-guy (well I am sure he will be blamed by his colleague for letting me to nurse in a staff room).

Fortunately, Omar arrived in the hospital so I can take a breather. I just could not wait to tell Omar what had happened to me. Upon telling Omar, he asked me to point out which one. I finally saw him again, but now with a uniform. He is only a hospital attendant doing general duities. Omar then went near him, bent down his head to have a close look at his name. I was sure that he noticed my conversation with Omar. He did not even bother to approach us and explain so we definately will proceed with the complaint to the hospital.

I may sound telling people that it is troublesome breastfeeding in public but nursing is a beauty art on its own. You can do it perfectly if you are at the right place at the right time.

Aaqil had been cranky and hyperactive. I was exhausted catching him running here and there. He also seemed to be not afraid with strangers. In a way it is good but still I have to teach him on how to behave.

My FIL has been finally discharged from the observation room. Time striked midnight and we took a cab home.

3rd Syawal Every Year !

3rd Syawal 1422H- Solemnized

I believe I am among the few women in this world who has never and never will receive a flower from their husband. Everytime I see woman happily holding a bouquet of flowers in her hands with her facial expression full of excitement and love, I will look at Omar's face and give him my sour look. Hell, he knows why I do that everytime and he will give me the same answer. " You will never get it till I die". After 4 years of marriage, I am already used to the fact that my husband will never give me any flowers for he says life is NEVER bed of roses, if there is one, then that's not life.

There was one time I got scolded by my aunt for calling his name "Omaqqqqqq". Let me tell you, a Kedahan gal, like me, speaks quite horribly in the ears of other soft spoken tribes perhaps, in kedahan terms they call it 'loqlaq' or rude. Well, something that I cannot change when he refused to be called 'abang, darling, honey, sweetie...and the list goes on..' as he prefers to be called by his own name. So if he does not hear me, I will scream "Omaaaqqqqqqqqqqqqq come here" . Some elderly cannot accept the way we communicate with each other. Besides using 80% english and 20% malay words, they probably think we are friends rather than a husband and a wife.

4th Annivessary-3rd Syawal 1426 H

It takes a strong will to follow him and reside in Singapore. It was not easy at first and I thank God for giving me strength and determination to be his wife.

To my husband: I thank you for your patience all these years.. May this marriage be blessed by God. Aameen!

Our product & Gift from GOD - 15 months old

Eid Mubarak...

I am taking this opportunity to wish 'Eid Mubarak' to whoever you are wherever you are...

Ramadhan & Bird Flu...?

Swans? Geese?

Today we had a major change of plan. Initially, we planned to clean the house and make it look neat for the coming Hari Raya though Omar and I believe, the house should look neat and clean everyday. But then we decided to go to Jurong Birdpark and ignoring the bird flu outbreak news.

Excited although at the back of my head I hate to leave my house in a mess, we took public transports to get there. The weather was not really friendly as the heat soared. Arrived at almost 3 pm, we managed to catch "Bird Show". It was amazing how they trained those birds to do things what we thought they couldn't do.

Aaqil seemed to enjoy the show very much. As a mother I am relieved that my son likes animals. I do encourage him to know animals because I remembered the first flash cards I bought for him are about animals.

Jurong Birdpark, also popular for its highest man-made waterfall in the world. For the fanatic bird watchers, this place could be heaven.

Aaqil naturally loves water just like other babies I suppose. So it is not difficult to make him walk on his own with the park surrounded with pools and ponds. Enough to tire him and easy night sleep for him later on.

Conclusion... I believe it is not a good idea for some Malays to do outings during Ramadhan, but to me... what is the difference shopping in the heat of Geylang Serai in one hot afternoon comparing to a serene walk engulfed with nature in its best outfit to soothe our busy souls. Bird flu? Well, we are more confident on the health status of the birds over there which are sterilised and taken care at their best.... comparing to birds roaming around our estates which are not sterilised at all? Anyway, bottomline, if bird flu strucks, you don't have to be in Jurong Bird Park to be infected by one.

Dedicated to my 'late' Mother whom I called 'Mak'...

Family pic taken on Eid '04,

Back row from left: Firdaus & wife Rodiah, husband Omar & me,

Front row from left: Najwa, Ayah (Dad), Mak (Mom), Farid

Since I got married almost 4 years ago, I was very curious abt the way I was brought up by my mother. It was because I already started 'trying' and I thought of learning from my mom first, then exploring myself through books and internet.

I remembered when I was in Primary 4, my second brother always went to school with my mom in a car, and the best part, my mom was my brother's class teacher. I never got a chance to be with her in school. I was sent away to Convent Primary School in Kulim and I remembered exactly how pissed I was when I felt like my mom spent less time with me as compared to my brothers. And what I hate most, taking 2 buses to reach my school every morning and my brother would have the comfort inside a car with my dearest mom.

Lesson 1: A child will be happy if mother is around for him/her, thus I will make myself as available as possible at home whenever I am needed...

Secondary School: Mak sent me to boarding school after I made her proud in my SRP exams. Why?...Why?....She said, "I want you to learn to be independent!" I remembered I asked her,"Will my younger brother goes to boarding school too?" She then nodded.
But he never went to boarding school after all. His school was 10 mins away from home and it was a better school than MRSM during that time.

Lesson 2: I will let my child decide his/her study path according to his/her level of interest...

As a result, my SPM was not as good as expected. The day I got my result, I saw my mom cried. Maybe her friends' kids got better results than mine. I was sad too though I knew i suck academically. But God is great, with those results, Mara offered me to study in Boston, a place I never had dreamt to go. I remembered I started to become rebellious when I was a teenager and always talk back when my mom advised me.

lesson3: Fully equip yourself when your kid turns teenager. They might give u heart attack! Bottomline, it is your upbringing that will affect most of his characters until he develops his own...

After a few bad relationships and series of datings, finally I found my partner. Mak was so sad when I first introduced my so called bf, She cried and asking me whether I was sure to stay in Singapore. Among things she said "too far, negeri kafir (secular country), how often can we see each other, will u get a job"..and so much questions and I tell u..I almost crack!...But I am sure, I am now married to him because God has given his permission to.

After 2 years, I finally got pregnant in Ramadhan 2003. I started to feel how difficult carrying a baby on my own...I felt love sick for my mom and pestered to Omar to go back to Kedah as much as we can...

A few secrets revealed when I went back to see my mom.

1. I was not a breastfed baby
2. I was taken care by my granny who told my mom that her breastmilk was no longer fresh so she should give me formula milk.
3. My mom felt bad and depressed after giving birth to me because of the strong traditional confinement method and that affected her milk supply too.

Lesson 4, GOD willing, no mater what, I will breastfeed my baby without any intervention from anyone.

As a result of not consuming breastmilk, my IQ is not as good as my siblings, just kidding?. She only realised the importance of breastfeeding only after she had her 2nd child onwards, I was the eldest.

When I was 6 months into pregnancy, I went back again to kedah to see my mom..I always missed her and talking over the phone was not good enough. She gave me some "oil and barut" for my usage and she apologised to me for not being there with me. She had phobia of high rise apartment and I totally understand. Firdaus got a kid earlier than me and my mom looked after my nephew. Well maybe I have grown up and got real. I actually did not feel jealous of the fact that my own mother will not be with me during my labor. In fact, I told myself, lets be proud for not 'susahkan mak'. And I did it, just the 2 of us for labour and post pregnancy, no interventions...

There were times during my confinement days when I felt panicked and I would quickly called my mom and my mom would scold me..." brocoli angin, sawi putih angin, mee sua angin..everything you choose angin and u cooking it!!! " Adehhhh....Nasib baik I did not get postpartum blues....

She is gone now...

I managed to fly back when she was diagnosed with stroke but her brain got already clogged. I was so sad inside for not being there with her all these years, to listen to her, to drive her around....She was 63 then. 1st Dec 2004, she passed away with a smile on her face. I have to accept that God said its time for her to go.... God is merciful.

Now she is gone and I do really miss her. The fact that she has never been to my home in Singapore made me more sad...

To my beloved mom...May your soul be with GOD....!

Aameen...

Aaqil in Bangkok

View from Baiyoke Sky, the tallest hotel in Thailand

Although the trip to Bangkok was in March '05, I feel like writing it as the journey was the most memorable one, bringing our baby who was 7 months at that time, tagging along Omar for his work trip.

The 2 hours journey inside the flight was pretty smooth as little Aaqil had fun mingling with pretty stewardess and other passengers. At some time he would feel cranky especially when he could not bear the ear preassure on flight and I just have to lift up my nursing top and breastfeed him..So much easier and convenient while travelling.

We arrived in Bangkok at noon and the arranged transport brought us to Baiyoke Sky Hotel. Yeayy..We had a pretty big room and Aaqil seemed so excited. First thing, Chatuchak Market...I was thinking to get my country kitchen stuffs....and some clothing. But upon reaching there by toog-toog (my cap flew off my head on the way here, strong wind, strong speed generated by the toog-toog) I was so tired to browse through thousands of shops there...So ended up with nothing...

2nd day, headed to MBK and Siam Square. I did some window shopping there and we had dessert in HRC Bangkok..

Luncheon at HRC Bangkok

3rd day, swimming time for Aaqil at the hotel pool. We were amazed by the fact that he was not afraid of water and could float by himself. It showed how true that baby started swimming in mommy's belly and that skill will last. After freshening up, we took the train to Sukhumvit and Patpong Market. Had dinner at a restaurant totally opposite the strip club...

Look mommy, I'm swimming..!

I have been to several countries, but I love Thailand...A friend told me that her family will never travel to places like Thailand or Jakarta (tak main negeri2 panas)...But what I am looking forward now is Jakarta and of course to revisit Thailand with little Aaqil. To me Asean countries are exotic in terms of food and treatment.